Thursday, April 24, 2008

What Choice Did I Have?

Me: Sure, if you use a condom.
(I have a choice.)

Him: Do I have to?
(He lightly caresses me with his hands.)

Me: NO, NO, NO, NO. I won't do it without one.
(I pull back.)

Him: Why not? Don't you love me?
(He reaches for my hand unsuccessfully.)

Me: NO, NO, NO. Yes, I love you, but I still want you to use one.
(The real reason why is left unsaid.)

Him: No, you don't really love me.
(He looks at me with a sad face.)

Me: I do love you.
(I don't like him feeling sad.)

Him: We have done it before without one.
(He smiles at me.)

Me: NO, NO. That was then.
(I love his smile.)

Him: Come on baby.
(He approaches me.)

Me: NO. I wish you'd use a condom.
(But I know he doesn't want to.)

Him: You love me you know.
(He wraps himself around me holding me tight against him.)

Me: I do love you.
(I hold him back to be nice.)

Him: Please baby do it for us.
(He kisses and caresses me.)

Me: Ummm....I don't know.
(I don't want to disappoint him.)

Him: Show me you love me.
(He pushes my buttons without me being aware.)

Me: Well... umm...
(I don't really want to, but ...)

Him: That's my girl.
(He undresses me and I him.)

Me: You are so good.
(I say this as he is inside of me.)

Him: I love you.
(He is happy; I'm glad one of us is.)

Me: Do you really love me?
(I can feel it is too late for me now.)

Him: I will always love you.
(He looks so relaxed and happy.)

Me: Me too.
(I sigh with sadness tinged with regret.)

Him: Is was good wasn't it?
(He doesn't want to hear no.)

Me: Yes, it was.
(Soon, inside my body, two cells will multiply and divide after becoming one.)

Him: Glad you like it.
(He smiles a big smile.)

Me: Yes, I did.
(But what choice did I have?)

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