Friday, August 7, 2015

Invisible Walls

Within my invisible walls I feel safe.

They are strong, but I feel lonely.

Bad girl, bad girl, bad girl echos through my head.

Looks into the closet for what to wear.

Feeling like something real sexy for bf.

A movie of his is waiting for me to watch him to walk out of the movie

and whisk me away from my life in his arms.

He is safe, unlike my last ex who left me in handcuffs.

Looking in the closet, for something other than the over sized clothes I normally wear,

a front zipped striped bandeau tube top is looking forlorn 

It barely fits over my nipples, but my bf will like the view. 

Next I find a micro mini skirt that I have not worn since losing weight.

It hangs loosely on me, but my bf will like that too.

They are both sky blue hemmed with  peacock blue thread. 

His latest movie starts and my bf is sitting next to me,

waiting till the end of the movie to take me away. 

Suddenly about ten minutes into the movie, a knock and a friendly, familiar hello.

I stand behind the door and peek around it to see my next door neighbor.

Since his girlfriend left him 3 plus years ago, he stays home except when he visits me.

(and yes, i will sometimes visit him, but we are just friends.) 

"Can I come in he asks?" he asks.

Unsure, I look back at my bf who has left  me alone - all alone. 

No, not alone, no, so I tell him to come in. 

He tries unsuccessfully to look me in the eyes.

We sit on the couch, and rehash the same things over that we have told each other before.

His eyes bounce between looking into my eyes and 30 cm down.  

It feels nice to have someone look at me.

Subconsciously, passion starts stirring; fear starts receding. 

Chatting starts to get awkward as nothing new to tell. 

And he is getting ready to say goodbye I fear, so I move closer to him, and he reciprocates.

Passion keeps increasing; fear keeps decreasing.

He runs his hands up and down my arms.

Taking his hands, I place them on my breasts.

He gently squeezes them as my eyes close.

Feels so good to have them touched by another's hands.

I do not resist or say no as he unzips my tube top and drops it on the floor.

Opening my eyes, I see how much he is like me. 

Our lips meet, and I let him push me back as we kiss.

As we kiss our hands explore, and his shirt goes down to the floor.

Passion increases as fear decreases.

Kissing, touching, nibbling, and licking all over increases desire.

Eventually all of our clothes are on the floor.

Whispers in your ear that you make me feel so good, 

and you whisper back, you are good.

I Looking into his eyes, I tell him I want him; he tells me I want you.

We share our bodies, so there is no distance between them. 

Fluids exchanged with pleasure. 

Good girl, good girl, good girl echos through my head.

Passion reaches its peak; fear bottoms out.

Lying together afterwards; neither of us can believe it.

Shock and happiness mixed together.

Wondering what to say next.

He gets up and gets dressed.

"Where are you going?"

"Have to leave. Bye." and with a smile to me, he exits through the front door.

After putting my panties on, I go to my room and look for some over-sized clothes.

Bad girl, bad girl, bad girl echos through my head.

My invisible walls are shattered.

I start rebuilding them.

No comments: