Whatever

I am allergic to fish

But I do love you

I do not want to have a reaction

sigh

Whatever you want, dear.


Why do you never do things with me?

But I do love you

I want to go out with you

Sigh

Whatever you want, dear.


Why do we always have to eat meat?

But  I do love you

Let's just have a salad and some veggies

Sigh

Whatever you want dear.


 I just want to cuddle

But I do love you

just hold each other

Sigh

Whatever you want, dear.


I want us to use birth control now

But I do love you

I want kids later, not now

Sigh

Whatever you want, dear.



I feel sad

But, I do love you

You want a smile?

Sigh

Whatever you want, dear.










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I Love You

I love you;

Really do.

But scared to love you;

afraid of being hurt.

Want to love you unconditionally;

the way you love me.

I long to be held;

to feel your warmth against mine.

The warmth of your love filling me;

my warmth would be filling you.

Filling me with love;

my love filling you.

 That is my dream;

to love you as you love me.


 

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Hope

Life goes on.



The wait goes on..

Wonder what is next?

Do I care?

I wonder if I do.

But I do.

More than what I want to admit.

I go on because I want to.

Because it is my choice.

I will not give up.

I will not lose hope.

Life is beautiful.

Life is getting better.











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I Want

What do I want?

I do not know.

I always defer to the other.

Really, I just go along.

Yes, whether I want to or not.

My happiness does not matter.

Only yours does.

 How do I know what I want?

What does it matter?

My feelings do not matter.

What if you say no?

I just want you to tell me what to do.

Ok, ok.  I will tell you.

You will not be angry, will you?ant

Good. I want, I want...

I want to lie next to you.

To feel you heart beating.

To have you hold me.

Nothing else.

Thank you
















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Oh? Oh. Oh!

It's normal.

That's the way it should be.

That's the way it was done.

That's the way I learned normal.

But just because you learned it as normal,

does not mean, it is right.

 Oh? Oh. Oh!

My god, you are right!

I am so sorry,

but sorry does not undo the memories

of the pain that I have inflicted on you.

I hate the one who taught me this way,

yet I do the same,

so how do I feel about me?

How do I break this cycle?

I have to do it myself

for only I can change me.

 However, it will be easier with you at my side.


Nevertheless, you want a break to reflect on what you want.

I understand and accept.

I hope you come back, but that is not my decision to make.

Therefore, love will be set free, and if our love still exists,

it will come back.

If not, I will move on after wishing you the best.

That is normal.





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Together

As we start our journey together, 

We must focus on what is important. 

What really matters is communication. 

For that is the mortar that binds us in love. 

Love is strengthened by compromising. 

Love is strengthened by actively listening.  

Love is strengthened by caring. 

Love is strengthened by mutual respect. 

Love is strengthened by asking for help. 

Love is strengthened by leaning on each other. 

Love is strengthened by positive feelings. 

So together in life, our love will guide us. 

Guide us on our journey together. 

That is Love

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The past for me is like a prison

Where the key has long since been thrown away.

But I want to be outside these walls

Where love, touch, and fresh air exist.

What are they like

For dim memories of them exist.

Exist still?

Who knows.

All I desire is to be free

Where long forgotten memories can rediscovered.

And have new memories formed



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