Shapeless Fear

I wonder while living with my fear.

Fear which is not known.

Fear which has no shape or form.

Nothing tangible.

Tangible is good - even if it is bad.

Then I could move on.

Move on to whatever awaits.

I can do no more.

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What is it?

All better after a couple of weeks.

Then three weeks later, it is back.

Or is it?

Is it something else?

Is it what I fear?

Is it nothing to fear?

Or is it everything I fear?

What I don't know is the biggest fear.

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Forward

In limbo, waiting for things to happen;

but they don't, so I wait and wait.

Then I take action to move them forward.

As I take action, I feel overwhelmed, scared.

However, I do take it.

I will not let myself be held hostage by my fears.

It's so easy and natural to be let myself hold myself hostage.

This once I will not fall into that trap.

That trap of spiraling into my head deeper and deeper.

Losing connection to what is possible and even to reality itself.

Instead I have learned to have faith in myself,

and to move forward one step at a time.

It matters not how fast or how slow I move forward.

It only matters that I move forward.

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Giving Up is Not So Easy

by Ashish

There was a Jack ,
Discriminated like a black ,
He knew no what he lacked ,
But he did'nt try to fight back.

But later he knew ,
Something brand new ,
That the morning dew ,
Was meant for only a few..

He Discovered at last ,
That he was losing his grip fast ,
the sea of problems was vast ,
And he felt like an outcast.

Things were the same ,
He did not feel sane ,
knew that he was going insane ,
but he did not feel the pain.

He felt so numb ,
He thought he was dumb ,
he couldnt speak nor say ,
and Suicide was the only way.

He had nothing to lose , Nothing to gain,
For everyone else it was a mere game ,
He knew for sure that the things were the same ,
And also he was insane .

He never wished mediocrity ,
Always had wanted aristocracy ,
He opened his eyes to see ,
Only to find that he was amidst the sea.

His dreams were big , ambitions passionate ,
He knew that this was his fate ,
It was not or it would be too late ,
He dived in the sea , Wishing to be at the heaven gate ,
But darn his fortune ...He landed on a floating crate...

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Having Fun, Then ....

I thought about you the other day, my online friend.

Wondered why I hadn't heard seen you in a while,

and hoped all was ok with you.

I was with friends having fun, enjoying the chat going on.

Then in a nearby conversation, I heard your name.

I was having fun, then heard you had died of a stroke, maybe.

You were young, under 30.

I had no idea what you looked like, and didn't really care.

It was nice just to chat with you, to share stories, lives, and ideas.

After getting home, I facebooked you, so now I know what you look like,

who your friends are, who cared about you besides me.

But what you looked like don't matter.

For what I miss is your heart.

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Forgot

I taught two classes,

but I forgot my glasses.

I could not see

if I had students,

or it was just me.

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Phobia

I want to move forward,

so plans I make.

The first step of my plan awaits.

My phobia comes around,

filling me with fear and dread.

I stop, I go nowhere.

Friends listen to me,

and support me.

Step one is accomplished.

This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.